Saturday, February 23, 2013

Insecurities (Repost)

Insecurities can plague us at any time.  They can be as simple as being self-conscious about your weight or hair, or can even be more complex encompassing any wide range of emotional or physical factors.  Let's take a closer look at insecurity and how it plagues the everyday existence of some of the characters of my books!

Lack of confidence or assurance; self-doubt

In Embracing Ember, we catch up with Anna who displays an insecurity that is in part due to a trait she admires in her friend, Serenity: 

Anna looked at Kylan who beamed with pride, but he didn’t know how panicked Anna was.  Anna was a labor & delivery nurse, sure, her job was important, and she took pride in that job.  Yeah she had read a few articles on fertility, had even volunteered her time at a fertility clinic for the extra education, but help with research – she wasn’t so sure about that.  
“Um, I think maybe you need someone else for this job.  Serenity may not be a labor and delivery nurse, but I believe she would be better suited for this.  I just…I, well.  I’m just not as smart as she is,” she said her voice cracking at the end.  She would never have told Serenity or even hinted to the fact but she felt insecure with her intelligence, especially with Serenity.  She loved Serenity, but it didn’t stop her from feeling inadequate in intelligence when Serenity was just so damn smart.  She hated herself for that jealousy and had tried to beat it down, especially since Serenity had never thrown it in her face when she didn’t understand things.

Now, let's take a look at Serenity's views on Anna.  Serenity is a curvy female and at times can be insecure with her weight, but there is a deeper insecurity that Serenity suffers.

Serenity let out a sigh then said, “Look, Anna, I know you mean well, but I bet this guy has no idea what I look like.  That will be awkward.  I mean, he will just assume that I will be pretty like you, and when he meets me, he will be disappointed.  I just cannot do that.  I will be embarrassed and you know I get angry when I get embarrassed.  Then you know I’ll say things that I will regret later while stuffing my face with everything that doesn’t run fast enough.”

Last, but certainly not least, let's take a look at a very simple insecurity that I believe most people suffer from.  In The Witch's Birthday Brew, Genesis's insecurity revolves around her curvaceous figure and something else???  

Sure thing Mr. Slime bucket!  Lucky for that prick his wife never called.  Genesis may be a pushover in some things, but one thing she wasn’t going to do was lie to the man’s wife.  Especially while he was screwing the beach blonde bimbo with fake tits that always looked down her nose at Genesis. 
Genesis didn’t have a problem with blondes, not even the boxed kind.  She didn’t even have a problem with fake tits.  Hell if you could afford them, then get them.  However, she did have a problem with the snaggletooth bitch calling her a whale.  Not everyone could be skinny.  Some people were a size eighteen and enjoyed eating. 

As for my insecurities...Well, they're mine and I'm working on them.  ;)!

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